Trauma is not

my identity.

Daughter of God, Wife & Mom, Entrepreneur, Soldier & Combat Veteran, C-PTSD Overcomer

Hi! I’m Tenay Benes and this is the summary and timeline of my story.

Today, I’m a thriving daughter of God, wife and mother, impact entrepreneur, and Army officer who lives in Colorado with my husband, Brett, and our family… but I wasn’t always this way and I overcame a lot of adversity to get here. Check out my personal timeline below to see details.

When you read it, you may think to yourself, “Ouch, why would someone share so many painful details about her life?” The answer is, “I hope my sharing vulnerably will allow others to see where they may have experiences similar to mine, and then help them heal from Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD).”

Did you know that C-PTSD often shows up through related conditions like depression, anxiety, suicidal ideations, compulsions, addictions, promiscuity, chronic illness, and the like? Treating the symptoms of C-PTSD will give you some relief, but only treating the root-cause of trauma will cure you forever. I have struggled with and received healing for all of these conditions, above. This means you can, too!

“Did you know that C-PTSD often shows up through related conditions like depression, anxiety, suicidal ideations, compulsions, addictions, promiscuity, chronic illness, and the like?”

tenaybenes.com

Personal Timeline

Key:
(-) indicates a traumatizing experience
(=) indicates a symptom of trauma
(+) indicates a healing experience

• 1980s
  • Born in Turkey to dysfunctional family (-)
  • Parents divorced (-)
  • Grandfather incarcerated (-)
  • Lived with PTSD’d grandparents (-)
  • Witnessed domestic violence
  • Moved every 1-5 years (-)
  • Lived in poverty (-)
  • Watched friend die in car accident (-)
  • Lost grandparents as parents (-)
  • Mother married stepfather (-/+)
  • Immigrated to United States of America (-)
• 1990s
  • Began STEM Magnet program (+)
  • Was sexually groomed (-)
  • Began depression/anxiety (=)
  • Abused drugs (=)
  • Began toxic relationships (-)
  • Got International Baccalaureate degree (+)
  • Got Army ROTC scholarship (+)
  • Joined unhealthy military fraternity (-), began compulsive drinking (=)
  • Relationship with alcoholic (-)
  • Experienced military sexual trauma & victim blaming (-)
  • Began suicidal ideations (=)
  • Got Bachelor’s degree (+)
  • Began promiscuity (=)
  • Began taking anti-depressants (=)
• 2000s Army Active Component
  • First Iraq deployment (+)
  • Combat stress (-)
  • Began fitness-junky & isolation (=)
  • Toxic relationship (-)
  • Salvation with Yeshu (+)
  • Second Iraq deployment (-)
  • Worked in toxic Army environment (-)
  • Got medical evacuation (-)
  • Got Wounded Warrior internship (+)
• 2010s
  • Got Masters of Business Administration degree (+)
  • Started work as Human Capital consultant (-)
  • Started at Master’s degree in seminary (+)
  • Toxic relationship (-), Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (=), fired from consulting (=)
  • Left seminary, moved into parents’ souse (=)
  • Began Holy Spirit visions & prophecies (+), healing prophecy began (+)
  • Worked in toxic Army work environment (-), left command (=)
  • Worked in healthy Army work environment (+), Army professional education (+)
  • Marriage prophecy began (+/-)
  • Got Holy Spirit baptism (+)
  • Moved to Germany (+), returned to active duty (+)
  • Began deliverance prayer & inner healing prayer (+)
  • Began healing prayer for others (+)
  • Began social media, & street ministry (+)
  • Returned to America, began house church (+)
• 2020s
  • Marriage prophecy fulfilled (+), pregnancy prophecy began (-)
  • Pregnancy prophecy fulfilled (+)
  • Moved & returned to active duty (+)
  • Began healing from marital codependency (+)
  • Completed major trauma integration (+)
  • Began speaker/author/influencer prophecy (+)
  • Sexual trauma healing began (+)
  • Psychological healing complete (+)
  • Army medical retirement in progress (+)
  • Physical healing in progress (+)

Traumatizing Experiences

“Having parents who divorced? Moving a lot? Watching my family members be hit? Watching my dad drink? Why do you say these normal experiences are traumatizing?” Well, my healing journey with God led me to the Kaiser Permanente Adverse Childhood Experiences Study, the World Health Organization’s International Classification of Disorders, and some great resources by mental health professionals; they all agree with what God told me about these experiences being traumatizing.

Some experiences cause a little bit of trauma (like moving) and some cause a lot (like being sexually molested). Usually, the timing, duration, and context of the experiences decide whether it will cause acute PTSD (resulting in one major dissociation) or complex PTSD (resulting in many dissociations). Generally, the earlier, the longer, and the more numerous your traumatizing event(s), the more complex your PTSD will be. Check out this blog for more information.

A Message of Hope

If you’re struggling with the effect of one or more of these traumatizing experiences (-) or their symptoms (=), I have a message of hope: