Shhh… I’ve got a secret to tell you: I’m not your average bear. I’m idiosyncratic, I’ve got quirks, I’m an outlier in lots of areas that people tend to measure in society. This not-fitting-in-with-the-crowd especially comes out when I am Army-ing. How so? Let me explain.
I’m going to take command of an Army Reserve unit in a little while. In fact, I recently went to the Pre-Command Course, where I learned about the types of questions I should be asking inside and outside my unit in order to get equipped with understanding and assistance. I also got ideas and points of contact to inquire about those ideas.
To put it another way, I became dangerous.
No, Not Yet!
Why, you ask? Well, one of my quirks is that I’m not afraid to ask questions, at all. I ask them in huge meetings full of hundreds of people, and I ask them through email to people I’ve never met. I’m not afraid to look stupid, and I’m not afraid to show what I’m considering doing—even if it turns out to be a bad idea later on. However, I’ve learned this is not the case for 90% of my peers.
Most people in the Army don’t ask questions if they don’t already know the answer. They “ask” questions in order to lead others to their conclusions, or even to show that they are deep thinkers. They don’t often ask questions to learn something new; therefore, they tend to frown upon people who do.
That’s why, when I recently started asking questions to the dozens of general officers and other briefers who came to speak with us, I got chastised by several people for either asking stupid questions, “You obviously don’t know what you’re talking about,” or for sounding like I have decision-making authority for my unit, “You’re not in command. Not yet.”
In my mind, I was just asking questions—questions to learn things I didn’t know before and questions about possibilities after I took command. But to these folks, I wasn’t doing things the “way we do it around here”.
God’s Guidance
So—I did what I always do when people tell me to stop being the way I am, and do as they do. I prayed and asked God.
- Me: God, am I doing something wrong by asking these questions?
- God: (Laughing) No! I LOVE your enthusiasm. Keep it up!
- Me: Okay… you’re always so positive… it’s not very helpful right now… can you tell me if I’m doing something unwise? If I should be doing something else?
- God: This is who you are. Don’t compromise how I made you in order to fit in with the crowd.
What To Do?
It’s nice to hear from encouragement from God—it steadies my soul—but it doesn’t usually help me figure out how to do things better. Is there a better way to be who I am without pissing people off all the time? Do I have to cause a stir everywhere I go? Is that God’s will for my life? Will I always feel at odds with others because I cannot—in good conscience—follow the status quo?
I don’t know.
All I know is what the Yeshua’s most loyal followers said in Acts 4:19, “Judge for yourselves whom we should obey: man or God.”
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