I cried big, ugly tears on Day 4 of our #40daysoffaith adventure moving from MD to CO on the word of God, as I watched the movers pack up our stuff and begin loading the truck. “But, we don’t have a new house in which to unload this stuff on the other side,” I said to my husband—and everything got really real in that moment. It reminded me of how vulnerable I feel when I am utterly and completely reliant on God to make good on his word—or else!
The last time my husband and I followed a prophecy until its (dare I say, bitter) end, we came out victorious but also traumatized. Today, that still-traumatized-part of my heart remembered the pain that faith and obedience can cause. It hurts to trust God when everyone says you’re crazy, when the demons constantly whisper it to you, and when all natural evidence points to your inevitable failure if you continue to pursue God’s path for you.
Meanwhile, my husband had the opposite experience: he’s happy as can be and his stress level is much lower than yesterday. That’s one of the greatest parts about marrying someone who runs hard after God like I do; when I’m down, he picks me up, and vice versa. Today, he picked me up by hugging me on the deck as we watched a beautiful sunset and I cried.
Then, we picked up our daughter from our friend’s house for dinner and read Berenstain Bears’ “Moving Day” book, which my friend loaned us to help my kid process her transition. (I can see why; it’s an amazing book!) By the time we got home at 7:30 pm, we were all ready for bed. (Like…is it only 8:39 pm right now? It feels like midnight!)
The Prayer
God, please heal my heart of any trauma that prevents me from completely trusting you. I don’t always enjoy your ways, but I have tasted how good a father you are. I have learned that you always keep your promises, and you love blowing our minds with how much better results your ways achieve. Help me enjoy the journey. So be it—amen.
The Challenge
What is your #40daysoffaith adventure and how did Day 4 go? Is it getting real, yet?
2 responses to “40 Days of Faith – Day 4 | It’s Getting Real”
[…] As for my amazing husband, he had his own ups and downs today, because he is on his own faith journey. As he is more blessed by signs than I am, he was particularly encouraged that the U-haul we picked up today had an ad for Colorado on the side of the truck, and was brand-spanking-new (to keep his family safe on the road). He loved it so much, #wetookapic. By the evening, we were both excited that we were one step closer to finishing this faith-adventure well than we were yesterday. […]
[…] & My Family Story 40 Days of Faith – Day 3 | My God Story & My Family Story 40 Days of Faith – Day 4 | My God Story & My Family Story 40 Days of Faith – Day 5 | My God Story & My Family Story 40 Days of Faith […]
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